First I like to give a big shout-out to my Dad! Today is his birthday and I'd like to say he doesn't look a day over 59! That could be because he's not yet a day over 59, But he will be tomorrow! :) Love ya Dad!
Next I'd like to point out the picture of Elijah. I took this on Friday on our way to the car to leave for Ohio. At least I got one picture of him while he was here. The picture pretty much sums up his stage in life...GOOFY! I hear he had a blast over the weekend riding EVERY water slide and even his first roller coaster. He even did a slide with Jon that Andrea was too scared to attempt, so I'd say that's something.
The last few days have been spent in the pool. We've definitly had the weather for it. Sue can't complain this summer about not having good weather for the pool. It has been an ideal swimming summer. Hopefully that will hold for the next couple of weeks as we wind up our summer break.
I haven't heard a peep about my interviews. I fluctuate between positive and negative thoughts on the matter. When these two interviews popped up seeminly out of the blue, I really thought, "Oh, one of these has got to be it!" But, I'm not so sure. And depending on which day you talk to me, I might tell you that I'd be fine going back to my teaching position one more year. Jaena sent me to a blog site of one of her friends who had some awesome insights into what I'm feeling right now. I'm going to post some excerpts from her blog below.
Just before the puppies came to us, I asked you all for puppy advice.
The Gaffords offered this:
I can't really think of any particular products to recommend, but one of the best things we did for Allie was to teach her submission. We did this several times a day (especially if she was getting too wild, etc.). All you do is flip the pup over on his/her back (either on the floor/ground or in your lap) and hold him/her down with your hand. The idea is to not let them get up until they've relaxed. They learn to trust you this way. It was great advice, and our vet reinforced the same principle. Hold them down, belly up, until they relax. Submission. Trust.
That’s how I’m actually feeling in our life right now. Ken is still looking for a job. When he didn’t get the job we thought was his in February – a dream job coordinating a team to create and write young adult ministry material – we were assured by family and friends, “That’s because God surely has something better planned.”
Yet here we wait. Other dream jobs that we thought were his have come and gone. We are no further along in the job search process than we were a month ago. In fact, we’re further behind.
And maybe God does have some spectacular job waiting around the corner. Perhaps someone will call him tomorrow and offer a job. But for now, I feel like one of the puppies, held down on my back. Learning to trust. Trying to relax.
The truth is, when I turn the puppies over, sometimes I have no reason other than to teach them to trust me. To learn submission. Sometimes it is to give them a belly rub or clean their paws. But I also sometimes just have to hold them down to teach them to rest, even while they are uncomfortable.
I think too often we try to rationalize God’s behavior, demanding that everything work out to make sense --wanting there to be a reason for being forced to wait and hold still. Expecting, almost demanding, for there to be a good reason for the forced submission. We expect that God will always have something better around the corner when He lets us up.
And He very well may. Yet insisting that God answer me in a way that I think makes sense or provide something better means that I’m not really allowing God to be God. Part of allowing God to be God to me is letting Him hold me down, forcing me to wait, forcing me to trust.
Yes, forcing me to submit.
And sometimes for no other reason than for me to recognize that He is God, and I am not.
There may be something wonderful around the corner, or there may be more waiting, or there may be something that isn’t what we had hoped for.
All is not lost. I don’t despair. I can trust that He is good. Whether Ken gets a job of his dreams that now seems out of reach, or stays at home as a full-time puppy wrangler, or stocks shelves, God is still good. I can choose to be angry at God for holding me down, or I can relax in His arms, knowing that whether this time will end the way I hope, or the way I fear, He is still good.
So as I feel like a puppy lying belly up on a bare floor, I'm learning to relax in the hand of the One who is good, no matter what circumstances may come.
Okay, so I know that was long, and I basically quoted the whole thing, but it's EXACTLY how I feel right now and EXACTLY what I needed to read at this point. (Thanks Jaena) So, as I lay here on my back, I just keep praying to relax and submit my life to the One who truely knows best.
Yesterday, Sue wanted to go to the mall as JCPenny and Elder Beerman were having these terrific sales. I didn't have money, but I went along just for fun. Who came home with purchases? You guessed it..ME! I am ashamed to admit that I reverted back into a past addiction. But the sales were UNBELIEVABLE!! I got an $84 dollar purse (black leather, very awesome) for $18.00!!! Now, how could I pass that up? Then I walked to JCPENNEY and went to the clothes dept. I was just going to browse to see what "professional" clothes they had and somehow I got pulled into the next dept. which just happens to be purses. I got a little red leather bag that was normally $22.00 for just $6.00!! I mean, COME ON!! So, I'm happy as a lark and can't decide which to use first. I'm leaning toward the fun, red one and then save the black one for back to school. The message in church was on Gluttony, not just food but anything in excess. I'm not sure but the 2nd handbag might have pushed me over that line between okay, and excess.
Last, I'd like to say that my heart and mind have been heavy with thoughts and prayers for the Bucks, Grate's and Syswerda families as tomorrow is the year anniversary of Baby Ava's passing. I know that this will be such a rough week for all of them and my hope is that all of you will keep them in your prayers. I pray they will find comfort in the fact that she is being held in the arms of her Heavenly Father.
Kelley