Thursday, January 27, 2011

Decisions

I wonder how many decisions I make on a daily basis. Already this morning, I made the decision to not push the snooze and to get up and exercise. I decided what to wear, how to style my hair today, what to have for breakfast, and to not stop for gas but take my chances on the way home tonight. Since I've been at school I have made numerous trivial decisions.

There are big decisions weighing on my mind too...where is God really calling me to be for the next 20 years? Should I stick with education or broaden my horizons? Decisions are scary. I'm feeling like I'm being nudged to make a change, but what does that look like? Why am I so scared? I love a challenge and usually thrive in new situations.  Don't you sometimes wish God would just write it across the sky? Here...Do this!

I've also made the decision to involve myself in the Soul Shift series at church. I joined a small group of women who meet on Wed. night's to discuss the 7 Soul Shifts and what that looks like in our lives. This week the shift is from Me to You. Boy...I'm selfish. I think I've always known that on some level, but the sermon on Sunday, the reading and last night's discussion made it blatantly clear to me. If I doubted it, now there is no room for doubt. I am certainly Me focused, but I'm making the decision to let God shift my soul. That in itself is scary. There are parts of that change that are not going to be fun for me. How sad is that to say?! I don't want to be "others" focused sometimes, but God makes it clear that how much I love "others" even my enemies, is how much I love Him! That was a hard pill to swallow. I would say "I" have some changes to make, but I'm realizing "I" can't do it.

I'd like to ask any of you who pray to remember a friend of mine who made a really hard decision this week. She made the right decision, but it's impact will be wide spread and it's going to have a long fallout I'm afraid. Pray for peace in her heart and mind that she did the only thing she could. Pray for nights of good sleep. Pray for focus through the day as she tries to do all that is required of her.

In order to end this on an upbeat note...I have also made the DECISION to keep plugging away at this healthy lifestyle of mine and it is paying off! I am at 39lbs as of this morning!

3 comments:

Beau and Nicole Hummel said...

Glad to see you are blogging again - just read through all of them. Funny thing is that after Christmas I decided to also. It seems that for a person who doesn't journal - who knows she should - this is a good compromise. Congratulations on the weight loss!

Your blog made me thing of the song by Matthew West "My Own Little World"

Thanks for posting!

Nicole Hummel

Anonymous said...

First off, WOW 39 lbs!! That is awesome!! I am so proud of you!! I think we all are a little selfish and it is something that the world promotes!It is all about having things "our way"!! I am with you all the way in whatever you decide to do! You will be great!! I think we all can do better at putting others first and I hope to keep this blog in the front of my mind as a reminder!! I love you and I am so proud of you!!! Love ya, MOM

David Drury said...

Way cool to read this, Kelley.

Great words of insight into yourself and wisdom for others.

-Dave